cuteface

David, 6 days

We had a good morning today. Last night I slept for more than 4 hours, and this morning David has been either alert, eating, or sleeping; not too much frustrating in-between of crying or fussing. We even danced around listening to Jack Johnson for a while. Happy times. 

This afternoon has been . . . okay.  I met with a lactation consultant about my breastfeeding issues and the news wasn't great. I have pretty low supply for some reason she couldn't pinpoint. Thankfully I have a new plan of attack and it can only get better from here.  

a whole new life

Me and my David

We had our baby! The experience was unbelievable. . . yeah, I still can't really wrap my head around it. Can't believe this precious thing grew inside my body and now lives in this world.

I've been writing a long story about my labor, which I'll post at some point. I'm happy with my birth experience, which is nice because it's been a little rough since then. I'm not going to lie, this has probably been one of the most difficult weeks of my life. Nursing is not coming easily, going without sleep is definitely not fun. It's just hard, and I know people always tell you that, but it's totally different to live through it.

Which is not to say that this isn't also the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. I feel like I understand Love in a whole new way. For not only my son, but for my husband too. He has been a total saint.

More to come soon. . .

dropped!

I can't figure out why this baby isn't here yet. I've been dilated to 3 cm for more than a week, and the doctor keeps telling me I have a "favorable cervix." Every day I have more Braxton Hicks contractions. And the baby has definitely dropped. See above for evidence (and compare to a week ago!)

I know I've said this before, but my emotions really do vascillate between peace and anxiety these days. I know that the baby will come when it's ready. I know that this is not my event to plan. (Which is part of the reason I'm slightly uncomfortable with the idea of being induced, which will happen this coming Sunday if there's no baby before then.) I know I need to be patient and let whatever happens happen without fretting about it. But I'm ready, we're ready!

I was really hoping to give birth on this historic day. How amazing would that have been? I suppose there are still a few hours left in the day, though by this time I'd rather just have a good night's sleep and start laboring tomorrow morning. Let's all hope.

baby watch!

I feel like I'm on Baby Watch this week, like it's a storm or big event followed by a local news station. It should have it's own theme graphics and music.



Thanks Brian Fantana.

So, update: no baby. However, I did have a lovely day yesterday so I can't complain. Lazed around in the morning, got a pedicure in the afternoon, made some art, watched Juno. Appropriate, I know.

There's been a repeating pattern this week that I can't quite figure out though. Every evening I start to feel. . . different, somehow, and go to bed thinking this will be our last sleep without a baby. Then when I wake up the feeling has totally passed. At this point I'm just assuming the kid is taking after his or her mother (punctuality is not a strength of mine) so I'm trying not to get too impatient.

remaining days

belly update! 39.5 weeks. large and in charge. 

I have four more days until my due date. At this point, it's safe to say I'll probably be overdue. Just a hunch. I hope it's not by too much though.  I still feel pretty good but it's hard to wait and wait and wait for something and then . . . . wait some more. I've been going back and forth between feeling peaceful and feeling super restless. I know I need to cherish these last days of childlessness. 

A few good things:

- I have successfully navigated this pregnancy without getting cankles. HOORAY! It was one of my biggest fears. Stupid, I know, but yeah, just one of those things. I still fit into my regular shoes and boots. They might not zip up all the way, but they fit!

- It's the coldest week of the year. So far it hasn't affected me much. Maybe my inner pregnancy heater finally kicked in. (Which is a good thing since my winter coat no longer buttons very efficiently.)

-In my delicate condition, everyone at work worries about me driving. Any amount of snow fall = snow day! Tomorrow's looking pretty good. 

well, I'll be

I actually made some art. Hurray! A few pages from the week of Christmas. There are more on my flickr, and more for me to add tomorrow, too. 

(The book is getting so fat that it doesn't open flat anymore, hence my fingers in every picture. I kind of like it though. Gives it a nice scale.)

Anyway, besides art, here are a few other things that have been occupying my time this week:

-updating my tumblr more often. I think my attention span is better suited to tumblr these days. 

-Rereading Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth. I highly recommend this to any pregnant woman, or really any woman. I usually have an aversion to this word, but it's very. . . empowering. And has helped me to overcome some of my fears and weirdnesses about birth. One disclaimer, it is kind of for hippies, so if you are not into crunchy tales of giving birth naturally on a farm, it might not be the book for you. But I'm into it. 

-Trying to maintain a positive attitude despite the fact that I have HAD IT with wives tales, other people's advice, birthing horror stories, etc. I'm a pretty sensitive person and I think I take things too seriously, I just need to let all of it roll off my back. Honestly, though, who wouldn't hate hearing things like, "your hips are too small to give birth naturally." What the hell, ladies?! Let's be kind and understanding with one another. Luckily the good stories and sharing have outnumbered the bad, but the bad ones just linger with me. 

-On to better things. . . . I checked out Swedish Cakes and Cookies from the library and I think I might actually have to buy it. I made "Marta's Chocolate Slices" last night and not only were they super simple to make, the results were fantastic. Plus the book is just cute: